22:18, February 15, 2011 (UTC)

We are peculiar people, we will shed our human skin, and learn to fly, told by MuteMath, heard while reading In result you will have to wait for the explanation of your bird origins and current alienation from your home planet and the cats, a note from long ago which I’m still waiting for. Memories push back when my manner of gazes strike observances of my being a cat; when my nose strikes observance of my being a bird

But this is all wrong: This mix up of random poetic similarities aligning along an axis of words, only the same in so far as they are ambiguous, only giving way to the title because if we aren’t afraid of each other, we’ll be afraid of them. Data mining. Old words, new meaning. But mining for aliens in an art museum of alien metaphors leaves one with more metaphors than aliens

Afraid of aliens, afraid of the thoughts they fill us with, afraid of who we’ll be when we meet, or who we were when we met so long ago

Afraid that they left us here for a reason

Fears of the past shuddered away before the time had come, a memory held to that one fearful April night. Sunday, in the early hours of the eighteenth, a writer wrote this story better than I could (A fear in reply to a fear: I was dropped off back home and then well it was found in the morning that another cake was to be had though this one nearing end from the party my parents were at yesterday and so I started eating it and I’m sitting with this chunk of cake and it’s been reduced to a block like I like and I’m full so I put it back but then later I’m just eating it while sitting at the fridge and earlier I’d grabbed a chocolate from the bag that’s all fat like and there’s a beat going on and my complexion is so fragile to all this sugar I had some soda with my lunch which consisted of three oatmeal cookies but not real cookies more those sweet cookies that like the look of the word oatmeal and want a nice texture to them and I had a chocolate doughnut for brunch which also consisted of this mildly chocolate chipped muffin which was rather sweet I even poured some of the soda into my water to taste the tinted orange why am I eating all this chocolate I don’t brush my teeth enough to eat this many sweets but even then that goes into my body and bodies are such crude mechanical devices that have to deal with all this chemical wasteland and I’m not a wasteland I’ve still hopes to have dreams this doesn’t even include having eggs for breakfast and lunch the bread was all sweet white and I noticed my eating all this chocolate cake so I put it away only to start eating salty pretzels so I stopped with a handful and noticed that I hadn’t even noticed the grapes but then I started eating the grapes and they’re really just a natural poison sweetened that’s what all this food is it’s all poison but I can’t stop eating I want to stop my mother gave me a reese she got high in the car I could’ve probably gotten high too though she opines such more suitable at nineteen there’s too many temptations in this house it gets the devil singing glee but the voice is all piercing to the ears and I don’t want to hear but still moans echo why can’t drink steal away my memory it isn’t fair I’m not here):

Yet again in this state of fear. I can't seem to rid of it. I cryed than laughed at a friend's house over the state I would find myself in now.
It is silly but the hightened paranoia makes it not. I am to sleep and find myself in the morning undisturbed yet my mind refuses to believe it. It's that slim possibility of the worst. That slim possibility is enough to bestow insanity. I am not insane, just scared..more so terrified.

The 4th Kind. I recomend it, it was interesting enough to pospone a shower for two hours. The overall idea of the movie was a good one and was put tpgether with archive footage rather nicely. It is by that footage that you can tell the reanactements as horrible acting and now again I'm brought to tears. It's all still silly.

I don't understand why aliens would want to harm humans. I understand thier interest in wanted to learn human anatomy and whatnot and perhaps perform various tests on our minds. Yet why not go through it in a civil manner? If I were to be obducted, I'll like them to appoache me calmly and not speeking and a distored simarian tounge. I'd like them to maybe translate a letter to english and explain the procedure and how everthing would be alright. But, aliens may not have our lovely range of human emotions, so compassion or a sence of morality may not even be relevant. But still, why so many people? LEAVE US ALONE. we don't want you. WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN. I hear BIRDS. Well, odd, but that movie more so confirmed my belief. I'm too affraid to check the authenticity of the appart archive footage and the story of the main character. So perhaps you can do that, or if not I shall ask somebody else. I dont want to live in alaska. Alaska is bad. I hear the house. Cheak the statistics for Noam, Alaska for alien abduction. Well , I shall find that out. My sister have that same fear of lovely alien entities, ones of the stereotypical sort. NOTHING ELSE bothers me or them. Just that. Well, my sister was scared of The Grudge, but yeah that was silly. As this is silly but it is not. Honestly, I'm just mad that aliens are mean. Well, at least the one's who abduct people. Why can't they be nice? There should be nice aliens. We wouldnt be nice aliens.
NOBODY IS NICE.

Seventeen, still a child and slowly the fear crept away. Just wait until the light go off. Hey, if I ever go missing, know that aliens took me. that would suck. The house makes noises. GREAT no sleep. and philosophy to do. I shall do philosophy. My essay is horrible. Horrible. But decent enough. and the birds keep chirping away. No, I'm going to sleep so I can study and do philosophy and do art and do whatever else it is that I needed to do. Oh the mind and its rambling too bad at cant ramble about my exact range of emotions as I type this all out. My heart rage is probably augmented. Is there light outside? I shall not cheak ..what if there is an owl? we dont have white owls here do we? well it wasnt an owl and right there at the mention of owl the tears came back. The humorous thing of this all is the recognition that I am silly. even so, fear remains strong. strong strong strong. To this extremity the level of fear lasts only a night. I dont think I've had it when it was consecutive days like this. Perhaps it would be a couple hours deprived but all would still be fine. All is fine. Aliens being mean pisses me off. Perhaps in evolution we're all evolve to mean little creatures. we already are mean little creature, I already mentioned us being mean. Perhaps I am an alien , I've mentioned that before and there was just a loud sound. But its a house sound but if I was laying in bed in the dark and that sound suddlt occurred...my heart would pump oh so much more rapidly than I'd run to turn on the light, look around to see if everything was normally go sit on the bed , tell my self everything is alright than I would stand up and turn off the lights and try to sleep again. The house is making more noise, perhaps its the cats, perhaps my mother is going to work today, perhaps perhaps perhaps. I may aswell try and sleep. I shall apologise for the first e-mail sent to you in quite sometime being something of this sort. I am considering not sending it but I shall. And if you're offended than pretend I didnt sent it and all shall be well.



At this point the birds are loud
At this point I like their company
At this point the aliens don't want me

and that would've been the conclusion but my sister started breathing weird, I'm assuming she's having a nightmare. Lucky enough to find herself sleeping. Everything is not alright

goodnight,good morning it is 01:51, whatever that may mean.

I think I'm entitled to the FML comment, that would be so, but I do love my life.

But this is raising the question again, the question I already asked, of what makes the writing real and unreal? What is mine to tell, and mine to know? I think both that one should be honest, but that I should withhold information until it is most profitable to use

Go for broke. We all break sooner or later. We all break the same, again MuteMath strikes my mind. What would an xenophobic alien do if it got stranded on Earth?

I’m an xenophobe who hides for the safety of everyone. Everybody’s trying to figure out whether it’s genius or moron, but it’s quite normal. It shouldn’t be normal for these references to keep hooking the present to the past. I don’t want to keep seeing the blue sky as I walk back in the middle of a field with trees in the distance, all around, shouting with laughter and beauty “You’re my FML girl!” I want my mind to shut up, just as I was told then. Where does one hide when they tire of their mind’s own voice?

Nowhere. I want all these haunting ghosts of jokes long since old yet untold to truly vanish into their whisp, to go where I cannot: Nowhere